My Linux Stuff - Complete Blog For Linux Articles

My Linux Stuff - Complete Blog For Linux Articles

A Website For Complete Linux OS,Step by Step linux Installtion, Linux Tips and Tricks and Linux Stuff and so on... Connect and sharing here....

TOP 50 ENGINEERING COLLEGES IN INDIA 2014

TOP 50 ENGINEERING COLLEGES IN INDIA 2014

This below survey was taken many form many colleges in India. These Top 50 Engineering Colleges in India have Good Infrastructure, Good Environment, Educations , Staff, Placement , Research Activities and other Facilities are good.

Top 10 Government Engineering Colleges in India

Top 10 Government Engineering Colleges in India

These Government Engineering Colleges in India are really good for all kind of stuff like Education , research , Placement and New Innovation Ideas etc... But Getting seat in these colleges are heavy competition in students .....

Top 10 Colleges In India 2014

Top 10 Colleges In India 2014

Indian Institute Of Technology Delhi,Indian Institute Of Technology Bombay,Indian Institute Of Technology Kanpur,Indian Institute Of Technology Madras,Indian Institute Of Technology Kharagpur,Indian Institute Of Technology Roorkee,University Of Delhi,Indian Institute Of Technology Guwahati,University Of Calcutta,University Of Mumbai, National Institute Of Technology,Trichy.

2014 LATEST SURVEY TOP RANKING ENGINEERING COLLEGES IN INDIA

2014 LATEST SURVEY TOP RANKING ENGINEERING COLLEGES IN INDIA

This below survey was taken many form many colleges in India. These Top 100 Engineering Colleges in India have Good Infrastructure, Good Environment, Educations , Staff, Placement , Research Activities and other Facilities are good. If you want to do Engineering as your dream and try out these colleges

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Showing posts with label Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jokes. Show all posts

Thursday, September 17, 2015

Award Wining Jokes

LOW BATTERY JOKES

A Young man saved his girlfriend's phone number on his mobile as "LOW BATTERY"  with no ringtone.

Whenever she calls him in his absence, his wife takes the phone and plugs it to the charger..

The guy was nominated for Nobel prize for "Innovation and Peace"

🙏🙏
😜😉😝

Funny dedicate Moment Song

A boy Called FM radio & Said: I have found a purse with 15 thousand Rupees ,
a credit card & an I.D Card of Ms. priya, Ro No.12 BanjaraHills, Hyderabad

FM Person: How honest sir? 
So you want to return her purse?

Boy: No.. I just wanted to dedicate her a song.. 
LOL

🙏🙏
😜😉😝

Funny 5 Wonders of The world

SOFTWARE ENGINEER AND WIFE JOKES

Husband – hey dear, I am logged in.

Wife – would you like to have some snacks?
Husband – hard disk full.


Wife – have you brought the saree.
Husband – Bad command or file name.


Wife – but I told you about it in morning
Husband – erroneous syntax, abort, retry, cancel.


Wife – hae bhagwan !forget it where’s your salary.
Husband – file in use, read only, try after some time.


Wife – at least give me your credit card, i can do some shopping.
Husband – sharing violation, access denied.


Wife – i made a mistake in marrying you.
Husband – data type mismatch.


Wife – you are useless.
Husband – by default.


Wife – who was there with you in the car this morning?
Husband – system unstable press ctrl, alt, del to Reboot.



Wife – what is the relation between you & your Receptionist?
Husband – the only user with write permission..


Wife – what is my value in your life?
Husband – unknown virus detected.


Wife – do you love me or your computer?
Husband – Too many parameters.


Wife – i will go to my dad’s house.
Husband – program performed illegal operation, it will Close.


Wife – I will leave you forever.
Husband – close all programs and log out for another User.


Wife – it is worthless talking to you.
Husband – shut down the computer.


Wife – I am going
Husband – Its now safe to turn off your computer

Award Wining Jokes





Thursday, February 6, 2014

Love Conversations Between Boy and Girl

Love Conversation True Fact Between Boy and Girl

Love Conversations Between Boy and Girl


Love Conversations Between Boy and Girl
Love Conversations Between Boy and Girl
Love Conversations Between Boy and Girl





Girls Love Conversation Between Boy and Girl

Wednesday, February 5, 2014

Shopping Women Jokes Wallpapers

Funny Shopping Women Jokes Wallpapers




Shopping Jokes WallpapersShopping Women Jokes Wallpapers

Friday, December 20, 2013

College Jokes Collections

College Day Jokes Collections

First Day of college..
.
.
Boy sees a beautiful girl sitting right next to him,
& he writes on paper -

"i love you, do you love me ?"
.
.
She replies"No"
.
.
he didn't give up,
he rubs her answer &
passed same paper to another girl sitting left to him.

And she replies"Yes"
.
.
.
Moral of the story is: RECYCLE PAPER and save trees, save earth !
  





College Students Jokes

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Life before Computer Generation

Life before Computer Generation

Life before Computer:

-Window was a square hole in a room.

-Application was something written in paper.

-Mouse was an animal.

-Keyboard was a Piano.

-File was a important office material.

-Hard Drive was a uncomfortable road trip.

-Cut was done with Knife n Paste was done with Glue.

-Web was spider's home.

-Virus was flu.

-Apple and Blackberry were just fruits



Life before Computer Generation

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Software Programmer Joke

Software Programmer Joke

The boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the air.
The girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover: “Can’t you see the warning written on the cigarettes packet, smoking is injurious to health!”
The boy replies back: “Darling, I am a programmer. We don’t worry about warnings, we only worry about errors.”.

Funny Girls Searching Jokes

Funny Girls Searching Jokes

A group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only." Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide since each floor has a sign telling you what's inside." So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads: "All the men on this floor are short and plain." The friends laugh and without hesitation move on to the next floor. The sign on the second floor reads: "All the men here are short and handsome." Still, this isn't good enough, so the friends continue on up. They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men here are tall and plain." They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are still two floors left, they continued on up. On the fourth floor, the sign is perfect: "All the men here are tall and handsome." The women get all excited and are going in when they realize that there is still one floor left. Wondering what they are missing, they head on up to the fifth floor. There they find a sign that reads: "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to please a woman."

Funny Doctor Patient Joke

Funny Doctor Patient Joke

Doctor: Well, I have good news and bad news. Patient: Go with the good news first. Doctor: You have 24 hours to live. Patient: What?! How about the bad news? Doctor: I forgot to call you yesterday.
Ha ha ha ha .............!

Funny Marriage Anniversaries Joke

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee. "What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?" The husband looks up, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 17?" he asks solemnly. The wife is touched thinking her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, I do," she replies. The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily. "Do you remember when you father caught us in the back seat of my car?" "Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continues..."Do you remember when he shoved a shotgun in my face and said, "Either you marry my daughter, or I will send you to jail for 20 years". "I remember that too", she replies softly. He wipes another tear from his cheek and says... "I would have gotten out today!"

Funny Husband and Wife Conversation

Wife : You had lunch? Husbnd: You had lunch? Wife: I'm asking you. Husband: I'm asking you. Wife: Are you copying me? Husband: Are you copying me? Wife: I love u. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. Husband: I had Lunch :P

Funny Wife Advice "Spouse Funny Advice"


Most Wives Give Their Husbands Sound Advice. “99% Sound, 1% Advice!

Husband and Wife Jokes

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Funny After Marriage Jokes



After Marriage Jokes

After being married for 25 years a wife asked her husband to describe her. He looked at her slowly…then said, “You’re A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H…. I, J, K.”
She asks…… “What does that mean?”

He said, “Admirable, Beautiful, Cute, Delightful, Elegant, Fashionable, Gorgeous, Honey.
She smiled happily and said….”Oh, that’s so lovely…..
What about I, J, K?”
He said, “I’m Just Kidding!”
Ha Hah ha ha ha ........!

Funny Question and Answers Jokes

Students Jokes


Q: What is your date of birth?
A: Fourth October.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
Ha ha ha ha ha.............!

Husband and Wife Jokes

Husband and Wife Jokes


A man visited a marriage counsellor and said, “When we were first married, I wouldcome home from the office, my wife would bring my slippers and our cute little dog would run around barking. Now after 5 years it’s all different, I come home, the dog brings the slippers and my wife runs around barking.”
 ”Why complain?” said the counsellor. “You’re still getting the same service!”

My wife asked me to buy Organic vegetables from the market. I went and looked around and couldn’t find any. So I grabbed an old employee and said, “These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?” “The produce guy looked at me and said, “No. You’ll have to do that yourself.”

Funny Marriage Jokes

Funny Marriage Jokes


A man and a woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about. 
For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife ‘ s bedside.
She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents. “When we were to be married,” she said, “my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and stich a doll.”

The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness. “Honey,” he said “that explains the doll, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?”“Oh, that?” she said. “That is the money I made from selling the dolls.” : )

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Funny Manager Jokes

Funny Manager Jokes


<div style="text-align: left;">
1.”We will do it” means “<em>You will do it</em>”
2.”You have done a great job” means “<em>More work to be given to you</em>”
3.”We are working on it” means “<em>We have not yet started working on the same</em>”
4.”Tomorrow first thing in the morning” means “<em>Its not getting done“At least not tomorrow!</em>”
5.”After discussion we will decide -I am very open to views” means “<em>I have already decided, I will tell you what to do</em>”
6.”There was a slight mis communication” means “<em>We had actually lied</em>”
7.”Lets call a meeting and discuss” means “<em>I have no time now, will talk later”</em>
8.”We can always do it” means “<em>We actually cannot do the same on time”</em>
9.”We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline” means <em>“The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time.”</em>
10.”We had slight differences of opinion “means <em>“We had actually fought”</em>
11.”Make a list of the work that you do and let’s see how I can help you” means <em>“Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me”
12.”You should have told me earlier” means <em>“Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!”</em>
13.”We need to find out the real reason” means <em>“Well I will tell you where your fault is”</em>
14.”Well Family is important; your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected,” means, <em>“Work is the only priority</em>”
15.”We are a team,” means, <em>“I am not the only one to be blamed</em>”
16.”That’s actually a good question” means <em>“I do not know anything about it”</em>
17.”All the Best” means <strong>“<em>You are in trouble</em>”</strong></div>

Friday, December 23, 2011

Sardar Joke In English

Sardar attending a interview in bank..

Bank manager: Wat is cyclone?

Sardar: Its a small loan given by bank to purchase a cycle.!!!!

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Software Engineer Joke

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Funny Google Jokes



Google is a girl or
a boy?????
.
.
.
... ... . .
.
.
.
.
. Answer-Google is a girl.
She won't let u complete d
whole sentence, She start guessing &
suggesting ....

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Husband and wife Funny Jokes

Husband texts to wife on cell..

"Hi,what r u doing Darling?"

Wife: I'm dying..!
...
Husband jumps with joy but types "Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?"

Wife: "U idiot! I'm dying my hair.."

Husband: "Bloody English Language!

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